Monday, December 1, 2014

How... How... How...

How is it that the same people that once made you feel loved and special can make you feel inconsequential the very next day?
I strive and I fight and I try to reach out, to be a good friend.  After everything I've been through, I'm still trying not to just shut everything out.  And just when I'm proud of myself, just when I think I'm going to be okay, I get shut out by the only people I cared about. 
It isn't fair.  This happens to me over, and over, and over again.  Why do people see me as someone that can be easily abandoned?  Why am I the one who keeps getting screwed over?  I haven't done anything wrong!
I though they understood.  I thought it made sense to them that I was hurting.  I thought they were giving me a little bit of slack because I have been hurt so many times.  And then they turn around and do the same thing that broke me in the first place.
People wonder why I have no friends, and its because of people like this.  People who keep using me and them brushing me off like I'm nothing more than a pesky mosquito. 
How many times is a girl supposed to be broken? 
How much am I supposed to be able to take? 
How am I supposed to do this alone?

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