I Always Thought

I always thought being apart from him would be torture.  I thought I needed him in every area of everything.  I thought he was all I wanted.

Well, in a sense, I was right.  I did want him.  More than I wanted anything else before.

But separation has a funny way of giving you a whole new point of view.  I'm finally thinking straight.  I'm finally looking at the situation objectively instead of through tinted glass.

I don't need him.  In fact, he was probably the worst thing for me.  I have a habit of falling way too fast and expecting way too much.  He has a knack for saying the perfecting at the right time and showing up right when I need it.  But you have to be more than a knight in shining armor.  You have to stick around.  You cant just ride up and make me feel like a princess and then drop me back in the dirt to dust of my own dress.

When he was around, my mind way always consumed with him.  Even now, I'm having to cleanse my every thought of him.  He was distracting, overwhelming, too much for my crazy life to keep up with.  I have more important things to keep my focus on, for example, myself.  When he's around, all I want is to be whatever he wants.  I lose myself.  And in a perfect relationship you should find yourself, not completely lose it.