Renewed

People have a sick fascination with intoxication. Whether it be by illegal substance, prescription abuse, or alcoholism, people love the "high" and that is a truly terrifying fact. I just got home from two exhausting, hot, taxing but totally worth while weeks of church camp. I recommitted my life to God on Tuesday, July 8th, and let me tell you a little secret, ready?
You can be high on something other than brain killing narcotics. You can, in fact, be high on life. I can tell you from first hand experience that happiness is the best natural high you could ever find. I have been in a moody, dark, sad, angry, depression since September of 2013. For the first time in eleven months, I am truly happy. My soul is finally at rest and my heart is soaring through the clouds. I smile almost constantly. I laugh, completely and wholly uncaring of what anyone else thinks. I am finally happy. That isn't to say that I don't get sad or cry or get upset, because I certainly do, but the difference is that the sadness doesn't rule me anymore. It doesn't take over my mind and create twisted, sad views of the future. It doesn't warp my sense of self or my view of the world anymore. And this change was instantaneous. I bowed my head with a hateful heart and fifteen minutes later, after giving it all to God and deciding to life my faith instead of just say it, I opened my eyes with a sense of lightness and a genuine smile.
Finding God and letting him move through you is seriously one of the most incredible experiences in life. I have never found anything that eases my burdens like the hand of my Lord and Savior. I can't even describe the sensation I had after I gave it all back to Christ. Words like "peaceful" and "joyous" and "lightness" come to mind but don't even begin to encompass how amazing it was. I was weightless. I felt like I could literally soar through the clouds.
I don't know what your walk with God looks like. I don't even know if you have one. All I know, all I can tell you, is that I was lost and drowning in sadness and pain. If you read back like four posts, you find a dark, pained individual who couldn't tear the pain from her mind long enough to write a happy poem. As of Tuesday however, I can't fathom anything less the magnificently joyous. I didn't know peace like this could find my heart again. Now I'm not saying nothing will ever go wrong, because it will probably go worse than before as Satan tries to trip me up. And I'm not saying nothing hurts and nothing phases you, but I am saying that if you just give it all to God, ALL of it, all the good, the bad, the ugly, the pretty, the stupid, the huge, the miniscule, give it all up to him, and you will find that things are easier to heal from. If you rest in God's arms, the arms that created you, and take advice from the mouth that breathed life into Adam in the garden of Eden, nothing can take you away from him. You can wander down the wrong roads but he will find you again. He will always be there, and that is a high that you never lose.