How to Let Go

How do you let go of the people who shaped you? 
How do you let go of the things that carved you into the person you are? 
How do you let go of things without closure? 
I like things to end with a nice little bow and a card.  More times than not, it ends in a fight and a finale that says something like "we're better off without each other" or "I don't want to be your friend."  And then sometimes, there is nothing.  There is unspun ribbon and and jagged edges that run on forever and tangle around my feet and trip me up.  Sometimes, I cannot find the definite end, rather I find a moment where the world started to fade to a different color and no reason why. 
How do I let go of that? 
How do I walk away from something if I don't even know what went wrong? 
How am I expected to fix myself and change my behavior and become a better person when I am drowning in a sea of people too scared to call me out on my mistakes? 
How am I supposed to apologize to them for what I've done and ask for their forgiveness? 
I'm not brave but I am not a silent sufferer either.  When someone hurts me, I turn over my arm and show them the wound and often times, it is too much.  Often times, I am bleeding out calling out their name in accusation and they are running away, calling accusations of their own unspecified hurt over their shoulders.  I try to be gentle and forgiving but sometimes, the cuts are too deep and too close together not to call out.  But it is too much for people.  I am too much. 
And sometimes, they leave without a word and what am I supposed to do then? 
When he invites me to something special and then leaves me alone and then slips back in silently?
When they play petty games and block me out and then slip in with a trivial conversation? 
How do I let go without pushing too hard? 
Or is it okay to shove the people who broke me away when they try to walk back in like nothing happened?